YOU MADE YOUR BED….HOPE IT’S COMFY

Life is about choices.  You are free to make the choices that you want to make in life.  You are free to choose left or right.  You are free to choose to lie or tell the truth.  You are free to date who you please.  You are free to inflict pain or pleasure.  You are totally free in your decision making.  However, decision making is one of the most expensive freedoms that you have.  Making decisions is indeed a gamble, because although you are free to make choices, you are not free to choose the consequences associated with those choices.  You can choose to be disloyal to a person, but you cannot choose how that person will respond to your disloyalty.  You can even choose to have a child, but you cannot choose what that child will look like, act like, or be like.  When it comes to consequences you are totally POWERLESS and all your efforts to shape consequences are futile.  I said all of that to say this: you have to be careful about the bed that you are making, especially if it is one you are not sure you will be comfortable laying in.  You cannot keep making decisions and then running from the consequences of those decisions.  Sometimes you have to bite the bullet and say “hey I caused this, so let me deal with it.” Life does not afford you any rewinds or do over’s, so sometimes you have to focus on getting it right the first time.  If you attempt to make good heartfelt decisions, then you are less likely to be running, sad, and afraid when it is time to pay the piper.

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Calm Down: EVERYONE IS NOT HATING ON YOU!!!

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I was in a public place not very long ago, and I heard a lady say, “they talking about my shoes ugly; people always hating on me!” I instantly looked back at her shoes, and sure enough, I didn’t like her shoes AT ALL! I think it’s funny that we live in a society where anytime a person goes against what we are doing then they are automatically hating on us!!!!! Truth is there is a fine line between someone hating on you, and someone being truthful with you.

I think that a lot of issues in our lives intensify because we are not open to taking constructive criticism. Sometimes we are blinded by our own faults and need an outside person to tell us the truth. That criticism could be coming from a place intended to make us better. It doesn’t mean that the messenger is a “hater” maybe they just care enough to be honest. For example, the other day my mother told me my pants were too little. It offended the heck out of me, but when I looked in the mirror, I had to admit that she was completely right!!! If your loved ones can’t be honest with you, then tell me who can???

Nobody is perfect, and there is always room for improvement. If your bestie or bae offers you no constructive criticism, then he or she is lying to you. A loved one should push you to become the best version of you that you can be even if that means shedding light on some of those harsh truths. The Bible even said that a wise man accepts advice! When you’re criticized, don’t get mad. Don’t reject that criticism; it could be helping you to get to exactly where you need to be. Analyze the source of the criticism and use is as motivation to become better.

True enough some things come from a negative place, but that should even encourage you to keep grinding and accomplishing your goals. Take that criticism that comes from a negative place and use it as an excuse to really be all that you can be. THEN YOU MIGHT REALLY HAVE SOME HATERS!!!!
Bottom line, not every one will like you or what you’re doing and some will speak negatively of you. However, there are those people who care about you and want to see you improve, so they offer feedback and constructive criticism. Even on your best day there is room for improvement. NOT EVERYBODY IS HATING ON YOU!!!

If you aren’t being criticized, then chances are YOU ARE NOT DOING ANYTHING. I’d rather be criticized for my efforts than ignored because I’m not even worth talking about. What about you??

–Ro